Copenhagen Beer Celebration

Copenhagen Beer Celebration

Two days, four sessions, and too many beer geeks to count or throw a stick at. Some really needed that stick, but I’ll get to that soon. The Copenhagen Beer Celebration (the other CBC – but now known as Mikkeller Beer Celebration Copenhagen) is a brewery invite-only beer festival run by none other than Mikkeller.

Tickets are released in October for this May event and weren’t hard to obtain. We’d heard that purchasing tickets was like trying to get a Dark Lord ticket but alas, it wasn’t. Scoring two all-session passes was easy and they seemed to be available for awhile. As for the cost, try not to choke – 1,855 DKK for the four sessions. That puppy translated to CAD$385 – almost 100 clams per 4-hour session. Ouch. No further tokens to be purchased but $100 is steep for a festival, even one with amazing beer.

It’s apparent when you see the list of breweries in attendance that Mikkel is inviting breweries that appeal to his tastes – people who brew fun, unique, funky, wild, tasty beers. And a list of this caliber brings people from around the world in droves. We saw the same group of front-of-the-line-run-to-the-whales group at Borefts in 2014. I could tell you all about the beers and the breweries at CBC but I won’t. The whale hunters I mentioned, and their unfriendly boorish entourage, are what sadly sticks out for me about this event. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a great event with probably thousands of fun beer people, and if I hadn’t witnessed the over the top antics of this crowd, I’d be boring you with a list of my favourite beers.

Let’s see – how would you react if a stranger came up to you and said “oooh. That looks delicious. Can I have just a small bite of your tasty burger?” Yeah, no. GET AWAY. And yet this is common amongst the “Tickers”. Need a sip so I can go rate the beer and be THE BEST RATER OF ALL TIME. Woooo! Got a wee tear in my eye thinking of how we were so lucky to be in their presence. Special.

One shameless guy did this everywhere. Would ask, and receive a somewhat hesitant agreement, then take someone’s bottle and pour himself what he felt was an adequate amount to sniff, sip, smack his dumb lips, furiously write a note, sniff, sip, smack, write and repeat. Some of the bottles he was “sharing” were expensive. Like really expensive. Well that doesn’t matter, he needed that tick, dammit. TICK. I would assume that the bottles he bought he was also willing to share but that’s not really the point, or my point. The collective Ticker crowd whose sole purpose is to try as many beers as humanly possible regardless of how much their ass hat status increases, puzzle me.

Then there were this conversation:

Sara? I don’t see them on the list. Where are they?
[audible gasp]. You mean SARA? That’s Sante Adairius Rustic Ales [somewhat silent DUH!, less silent eye roll]

Perhaps there should be a test before you’re allowed to purchase tickets because if you don’t know dem whales, you are not worthy.

I could continue with more stories of the judgement that is evident when you don’t run, and I mean run, at opening for the most rarest whale ever. Jesus, relax, it’s just beer. Yes, I said it, it’s just beer. There was a lot of great beer to be had and we met another couple at one of the off-site events that also travels around for beer festivals and guess what? They didn’t geek out about whales and still enjoyed their beer. Imagine that. Those are the people we like meeting at festivals and frankly, I think the festivals that draw the Mega Whale Ticker crowd just aren’t for me. Stone Festival, Firestone Walker Invitational, Shelton Festival, Extreme Beers – all US festivals that attract beer geeks, just not the same caliber of Ticker extraordinaire. Judgemental, boorish, borderline mean and rude are not people I want to share this beer passion with. These US festivals probably aren’t cool enough for them which is awesome as now I won’t have to encounter the Mega Whale Ticker. Good riddance.

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